What would you do if..

NinjaCows · Joined: 15 Sep 2005 Posts: 505

Okay. You've been going out with a girl for a long time.. A year now. But lately she's been acting weird.. You find out she has become a zombie (This would explain why she tried to eat your hands last time you touched her), and you want to break up with her. You can't think of a way to express the way you feel, though. She's beautiful, even as a zombie, but you just can't commit to someone who.. Well. Someone who is a zombie. You don't mean to be racist, but it's how you feel. You want to tell her but you're not sure how. So how do you deal with this situation?
_________________

Tacodude · Posted: Sun Sep 18, 2005 12:00 am Post subject:

With a shotgun.
_________________
"America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, bad ass speed."
--Eleanor Roosevelt - 1936

NinjaCows · Joined: 15 Sep 2005 Posts: 505

I'm sure if you were in this situation, her parents wouldn't agree with that.
_________________

Smiley Of Terror · Joined: 01 Sep 2005 Posts: 143

well it depends if she was eating people, or if she was just losing motor control. 'cause aslong as she didn't try and eat anybody, I'd try and look for a cure (it wouldn't be much different from parkinsons or multiple sclorosis)

Tacodude · Posted: Sun Sep 18, 2005 1:31 am Post subject:

The last time I checked, zombies were dead. The last time I checked, there was no cure for death.
_________________
"America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, bad ass speed."
--Eleanor Roosevelt - 1936

NinjaCows · Joined: 15 Sep 2005 Posts: 505

What, you've never been to a hiphop concert? Of course zombies are alive. It's like a sea of baggy jeans and shirts two sizes too big.
_________________

Tacodude · Posted: Sun Sep 18, 2005 2:32 am Post subject:

Never been to a hip hop concert. Hip hop got boring (for me) in 8th grade.
_________________
"America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, bad ass speed."
--Eleanor Roosevelt - 1936

NinjaCows · Joined: 15 Sep 2005 Posts: 505

Mainstream hiphop got boring for me in 8th grade, too. I preffer listening to stuff that doesn't make it to the top 50. Half the time It's way better and has way more meaning. I mean, more meaning than "lol wtf i pimp u mumma nub, i hav a gun", they are truly the noobs of hiphop. They probably don't even have a real "Chain of Bling", because, you have to have an awesome level of over 30 and they are only level 3's. Nubs.
_________________

Smiley Of Terror · Joined: 01 Sep 2005 Posts: 143

if zombies are real... them why can't a cure for zombies be real?

mep · Posted: Sun Sep 18, 2005 5:34 am Post subject:

king istrom · Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 2498

id tell the parents in the politest manner possible, if they turn out to be zombies as well, they all die(again?)

Shavic · Joined: 12 Sep 2005 Posts: 682 Location: Dallas, Texas

Ok I'll tell you the most simple and delicate way to easily avoid this whole situation. First you wear leather gloves and a hoodie on your next "date" with said girlfriend, since she is a zombie she won't notice this horribly done fashion faux; and will gladly go with you, hoping to catch you at a most excellent time to eat your brains. ALWAYS keep and eye on her, this is most crucial... Inside the hoodie you bring along a .22 pistol hidden away in the hoodie pocket. Take her somewhere romantic, but secluded. And tell "Baby, I got something I really need to talk to you about." hold her close and not to tight, so that decomposing parts don't fall off. Because it's at this point you really need the hands to still be attached. slowly stake her hand and slide it into the pocket making sure to lace her hands around the gun and onto the trigger. And in that moment that she might realise what it is, OR that she tries to bite your face off. Make sure the gun is aimed at her head, and bust a round off at her face. The bullet will rip into her skull and bounce around like a marble in a coffee can and rip her brains to shreads killing her. Then as her body slumps you can say something like. "See, now you really do remind me of when we were in bed together the first time."

OH SNAPS!!! I FUCKING WENT THERE!!! Twisted Evil

_________________

king istrom · Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 2498

NinjaCows · Joined: 15 Sep 2005 Posts: 505

Shavic deserves a medal for that.
_________________

king istrom · Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 2498

he should get it bronzed (smirk, giggle)